What a week!

I have decided to start a 'blog' to document the journey we have somehow found ourselves on.
Here goes...
This time last week I was enjoying my pregnancy and looking forward to my 20 week scan, the scan took place on Thursday 8th September at 9.30am at Northampton Hospital.
This was to change the course of our lives, mine, my husbands and my daughters.
Having suffered a miscarriage in May 2010 at 10 weeks this pregnancy started with a fraught first 12 weeks, I was constantly on alert looking for signs of another miscarriage, I was neurotic about what I was eating and drinking, I can't say it was enjoyable, I was terrified every single day!!
...but the 12 week scan was a breeze, baby was alive and looked perfect!
We were so happy and really started to look forward to our future with a little baby brother or sister for Grace!
The next 8 weeks I began to relax a little, I even had the odd glass of wine (about 2 in total!)
Then came the 20 week scan, should we find out what we're having or not?
This went on for weeks, should we shouldn't we, anyway in the end we decided to find out!
I really wanted a boy and Alan said he didn't mind, (but I think he really wanted a girl.)
The morning of the scan I was confident that it would be a girl....we had picked the name Florence and pretty much thought it was a done deal.
To my complete surprise I got what I really wanted, a BOY!
The first part of the scan was routine, checking he had his arms and legs and a perfect little face.
The sonographer began to take a close look at baby's heart, she took measurements and kept going back to re-take them. Not a reassuring sign! When she said she was going to ask a colleague to confirm something I froze.
Alan and I looked at each other confused but I knew right away something was up.
Another lady came in and agreed there was a problem, we were told our baby's aorta was measuring small at 2.7mm. The aorta should be roughly the same size as the pulmonary apparently but that was measuring 4.3mm.
When the sonographer said she would be referring us to Oxford I burst into tears, what did this all mean??
We we're told to wait for a call from Oxford about our appointment.
So we went home, upset and confused but happy we we're expecting a boy, worried sick what was wrong with him.